I write differently from what I speak, I speak differently from what I think, I think differently from the way I ought to think, and so it all proceeds into deepest darkness.
Franz Kafka
(via feellng)

This tho


I hate it when I ask my friends to do something and they’re like ‘Yeah that would be fun!’ but when I actually try to plan whatever it is they somehow have every excuse ever to not do it rather than just saying that they don’t want to do it


Effectively did nothing over reading week with 3 midterms on Tuesday, wooo



I went to get my armpits waxed and the lady told me I had a lot of hair.. Thank you?


Today I realized that I have an extra week of class that’s not really an extra week of class because it isn’t week 1-12 and week 7 is reading week like I thought it was, it’s week 1-6, reading week, 7-12. I feel so mislead, why aren’t these things clearer


Today, my Axe shampoo, body wash, and deodorant finally did their job: they got a girl to notice me. Too bad the girl was my grandma. FML

The way you smell won’t get you far. If you want a girl to notice you, step up and make her notice you. If she doesn’t, she’s probably not the girl you want anyway.

Ps. I hope you’re using Axe moderately because that stuff’s like nose death in a can


tastefullyoffensive:

Cat Buttwiggles [x]

Previously: Cats Giving High Fives

(via morning--phase)


adweeb:

mandaks:

My favourite line in the history of film.

(via the-ruffled-promenade)


Doing the Damn Dishes

We all agreed to do our own dishes. I don’t know what’s so difficult to understand. There was a big mess left in the sink and I cleaned them even though none of it was mine. I suggested that if you don’t have time to do them, leave them on the counter so that the sink is still accessible (and I don’t have to clean more stuff to clean my own stuff). I don’t care if they’re harder to clean because they get crusty. It’s not my fault that you didn’t manage your time well. And doing the dishes doesn’t take very long, you can afford to leave a minute or two later than you expected, because hey, you’re running late anyway, what’s another minute? Normally when I see dishes in the sink I do them without complaint, especially if there’s only 1 or 2 things, and I don’t need your condescending tone telling me that you just do it when you need it. Be more fucking considerate. We agreed we would all do our own dishes, so why aren’t we all doing them?